And when I saw you kissing that girl,
My heart, it shattered,
And my eyes, they watered,
And when I tried to speak I stu-uttered.

And my friends were like “Whatever! You’ll find someone better, his eyes are way too close together, and we never even liked him from the start and now he’s with that tart and we heard she’s done some really nasty stuff down in the park with Michael. He said she’s sleezy and if your guys with someone that’s easy, then he ain’t worth your time cause you deserve a real nice guy.”

So I continued to get drunk, and to cry. And lock myself in the toilet for the entire night.